Words from the Wise: I think I can realize when a piece is at a state of completion. -Geoff Dyer That Ugly Cry = The method of crying in your most ugly state. Your face is twisted, and you probably have snot just about to hit your mouth. Normally happens when no one is around, or when you don't care who is around. Usually signifies deep hurt, extreme sadness, or uncontrollable happiness.
If you remember, in my village, I worked with a group of high school girls teaching career prep, leadership, and self-love/care. The program, "Let Girls Work," is a sub-initiative under Michelle Obama's "Let Girls Learn" Initiative. (Don't tell me Let Girls Learn isn't a thing anymore, I'll always call it Let Girls Learn). The young ladies attended 8 classroom sessions related to leadership and career paths. Some things they practiced were interviewing skills, CV writing, networking techniques, and public speaking. I added my own twist to this phase by adding lessons of self-love, self-confidence, and love of one another as women. At the end of Phase One, the classroom sessions, those who attended all eight sessions applied for Phase Two, a chance to travel to the district town for a day of shadowing and mentoring with a person in their career field of choice. After Phase Two, the young ladies that participated in Phase Two will apply for the final phase. Phase Three, a weekend of workshops, mentoring, and shadowing in the capital, Kigali. When I was removed from my village, I was moved within 24 hours. Clearly not enough time to say, "See you later," or to explain why I had to move. I had already selected the ladies that would participate in Phase Two, but I wasn't sure if they would be able to continue the program. Even though Phase One was complete, my girls had asked me to teach about reproduction, how to cook an omelette, an number of other things. I didn't know what would happen with my girls club. Honestly, when they found out I was gone, they did not want to continue. The last thing I wanted was for them to stop just because I wasn't there anymore. Continuation of trust was also a big deal to me. I was afraid they would no longer trust an American or another volunteer, because I left without notice. So a huge part of my exit was and making sure they would continue, making sure they knew that I, we, were still in their corner. I reached out to my "nearest" volunteers and friends, Meredith and Grace, and without hesitation, they took on the task of making sure my girls moved on to the next phase and will ultimately finish the program, along with their own groups of girls. In the spirit of continuity, they coordinated with my counterpart, and found mentors for each of my girls. So today when I lifted my phone and the pictures of my girls in the district town for shadowing popped up!!!!! UGLY CRY ON CUE!!! (Uncontrollable happiness of course!) CHIIIIIIIILE, I mean sitting on the floor sobbing!!! My ladies look so good and so happy! As a volunteer you often feel like your work is in vain, like its pointless. You try to find a niche where you can plant seeds. A place where joy overflows. Not everyone is fortunate to find that place. However, my GLOWUP Girls were my niche. My little garden of seeds, they blossomed with each interaction. More personality, more confidence, and hunger to learn. Meredith and Grace, thank you from the bottom of my heart for making sure they continued. This morning allowed me to closeout my service, to finally have relief of service. My girls are in good hands and are KILLIN IT!! As for my service...Listen...NAILED IT!!!!!! Until Next Time, Live in Love...
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...First, you'll almost lose your life to a baboon! Yes, a BABOON!!! You may have read my Facebook status about my close encounter with a baboon while picking up mail from the post office. Just to clear the stereotype, animals in the post office, or any other common place is UNCOMMON! I'm still not over the fact that a baboon could have killed me if he wanted to. Have you ever googled Baboon teeth?? No? Go do it! THOSE TEETH ARE RIDICULOUS!! TAKE YOUR WHOLE FACE OFF RIDICULOUS!!
...Then, PLOT TWIST, WE'RE NOT GONNA LET YOU FINISH!! Ok, let me explain. March 23rd, in the midst of my community projects, I was pulled from my site. I was called on March 21st, to come to the capital on March 22nd, for a meeting. In the meeting I was told, "Tomorrow we are taking you to your site to pick up your things." Why they didn't just call and say, "Pack your things, we're coming to get you tomorrow?" I don't know, I don't know. So, March 23rd, a driver and a support staff from Peace Corps drove me to my village, helped me pack up my house, and took my back to Kigali in the matter of eight hours. Quick and slightly sloppy. No one knew I was leaving. My circumcision project was happening as I said my "good-byes." There were tears, lots of tears. My girls cried, Yvonne cried, I cried, water works everywhere. From that day, I did not know what would happen next. I was told, "We have to decide if we want to find you a new site. If we find you one they may not accept you if the previous supervisor has bad-mouthed you or altered the situation." I'm not going to spend too much time on blame, the details, or the fight with Peace Corps. If you know me personally, you know I've been on the battlefield! Ok? Ok! I spent almost six weeks in Kigali, six weeks in limbo. SIX WEEKS of not knowing what will happen next. Y'all know that's not how I roll! I spent my time playing tennis, binge watching Netflix, and meeting with NGOs and other organizations that possibly needed a volunteer. I'm a planner, I don't like uncertainty and I like to stay progressive, so you can only imagine how much my brain was working in those six weeks. My thoughts, "What am I going to do if they don't find a site?" Well, they didn't find a site. Was a site actually looked for, I don't even know. Even with my suggestions, a site was not found. So what happens? Interrupted Service happens. What is interrupted service? Interrupted service is like, "Things outside of my control interrupt my service." In my case, things very much outside of my control interrupted my service. It started really sloppy, me being a woman didn't really help the situation. Ultimately, it ended as my supervisor being investigated, and Peace Corps being afraid that if he found out where I was he would retaliate. None of this makes sense, from beginning to end, its all A HOT MESS!!! I'm not done processing, so I'll continue to use this space to share my experiences and process my thoughts. I have A LOT of thoughts and feelings about this situation. But in the meantime, "HEY AMERICA, HOW YOU DOING??" Until Next Time, Words From the Wise: "Don't sweat the small stuff, and everything is small stuff." -My Papa Joyner by way of some other man, but it sounds best coming from my Papa. |